AmNesia

I hope I can only remember the first time you looked my way

The first time you called my name and the first time you smiled at me

I hope I can only remember the first time we talked

The first laughter that we shared and the first impression that we had

I hope I can only remember the first time we went out together

The first time I held your hands and the first time you said you loved me

When we first embraced and you first kissed me

When we first danced and we first vowed to love each other

I hope I can only remember the first time you entered my world

And the first dreams that we made


Then I can only forget all the tears I cried for you
All the pains and the blames we threw at each other
All the hatreds that we planted and that never stops on growing
All the game that we're playing where no one wins


I hope I can only go back to the day that I first heard you sing

And the first time I sat beside you to see you closely

Im wishing to remember that first day I wanted you so badly it drives me crazy

The day when I never stopped on thinking about you

And the first time how much I really wanted to tell you

'Please stay with me, cuz I love you too..'

Gray Room

What is this feeling?
Is it the power of not knowing?
But deep inside there is someone
Whispering the truth behind the veil


But why are my hands so numb?
And my fingertips are all so cold?
I wish that I would never know
The truth behind the shadows


I wish that I would live
Forever in this sweet misery
The mystery is like a melody
But the truth is a pain I see


But my feet would like to go there
In the light cold it may be
I cannot see the beauty
Of the sweet words said to me


Im living and wearing this mask
Since the day that I fell down
I was never given a chance
To stand up one more time


And why do I have to crawl alone
Just to be where I am right now
And why this loneliness never leaves
Why this pain never stops


Is it because your anger is never subsiding
Will you hate me til the last day I'm living
Would you hide until I die
Would I cry until the water runs dry


Hush I want to rest, Im so tired
My journey is coming to the end
There are no more steps on the white stairs
And again I'm alone with this burden


What is it that I am so scared of?
Is it your face or your voice
I know there is no turning back
You cant be stopped, you left me no choice

Encrypted

Your heart is full of hatred towards me, maybe it's your way of saying your love is slowly fading

But no matter how indifferent you are to me, my love towards you wont change a bit

You may think I have hurt you so much, and you may think I am lying

But what would I get if in the end I know I'll just end up crying

No matter what I do, you always think I am your enemy

You always think all I do are all against you

Is this your way of saying goodbye because you can't tell it to my face

Maybe I just have to see through your eyes on how much you have really changed

I think you no longer care, that is what you wanted me to feel

I would appreciate if you could kill me bit by bit

This way once I'd died, I would still feel the pain

And I hope to see you smile that you've got your sweet revenge

Yes, maybe, you don't need me anymore

But I still lie to myself thinking you would change your mind

No I wont change my feelings for you a bit, cuz I don't want to regret

If ever that time comes which I fear, I know I did my best